Well, crap.

Am I in a minority of people who actually say things and mean it? Is there some kind of secret group out in the world that teaches a select group of people how to manipulate the other people's emotions for their own personal pleasure? Did I miss the life lesson about not letting other people have so much control of your happiness? And why in the hell do some of the people we love and care for most end up being the people who use us up and leave us in a heap on the floor the fastest?

Just a few things I'd like to request today:
1) Don't tell a girl you love her unless you mean it.  Don't say it just because she did.  Don't say it because you think it's what she wants to hear. 
2) If you do say it, make your intentions perfectly clear so that she doesn't spend the rest of her life wondering why, if you loved her, you kept breaking her heart. Wondering what she did so wrong to make you run off every time shit got serious. And please, please don't make plans for the future if you have no intent on being there.
3) If you do decide to run, don't keep coming back again and again....and again.  There's only so much leaving a heart can handle and eventually she might just fall apart.
4) If you break her heart once, she will forgive you someday...if you break her heart over and over, she'll NEVER forgive herself for letting you do that to her.
5) Don't expect her to forget a single moment even if you did.  And don't expect her to just be "normal" now.  There is going to be a lot of things she needs to say to you but she won't know how and it may come across like she's bitchy or nagging, but really she's just a flippin' mess and has suddenly forgotten how to have an adult conversation. 
 
All that being said, I wish like hell we all had an internal switch that would shut our mouths, focus our thoughts, and disable our texting capabilities when we start to get all crazy.  I swear I bring some of this on myself, but not all of it.  And as much as I envy those people who are able to let it all  roll off their backs, I actually prefer being an over emotional girl at times.  After all, if I wasn't this way, I wouldn't be me.  Some people can handle it, others can't. Some people say they love me for who I am, others actually prove it.

Probably the most random post I've ever written...

It has been brought to my attention several times in the past few weeks that I am always in such a good mood.  Someone actually asked my husband if I was really as positive and motivational as I come across on Facebook! 
Well, I don't know how motivational I am, but I do know that I would rather post something positive or silly as to rant on and on about who pissed me off today.  I know that positive attitudes are just as contagious as a negative one.  I know that each and every day I am given is another day to be the absolute best person I can be...otherwise it's wasted.  And at the end of that day, I want to lay my head down knowing I made a difference, no matter how slight it may have been.
I know that I feel better waking up and working hard to reach my goals  than I did when I'd sleep in and not give a crap about my health. I'd rather sweat my toes off in the morning than hit that snooze button at all.  In all seriousness I wake up BEFORE my alarm clock most days ready to get my tennis shoes on and get to the gym or the park. I get excited about the changes I've made in my life and I share that with my friends.  If my excitement encourages someone to do a little more then maybe I AM motivational.   
I'm a firm believer in karma which really boils down to this: you get what you give.  If treat people kindly, if you listen, if you reach out to someone you hardly know anymore just to say "I'm here for you whenever you need me", you will be rewarded with a smile, a genuine 'thank you', or maybe even a hug someday. 
Let me also just share a few things you may or may not know about me.  I'm loyal almost to a fault.  I will answer any question you might have about me so please, just ask.  Yes, I have a past.  No, I am NOT ashamed of it.  There is not a single song in this world that doesn't remind me of someone.  As happy as I am, I am always missing someone...I wish people didn't have to go away.  I'm having a not so secret love affair with Eric Church's album "Chief". (AMAZING RECORD!!)  I. Am. Fierce. By October, I fully intend on being able to call myself a runner without feeling like a complete poser.  Oh, and also by then, imma be HAWT!! :)
And lastly...I'm gonna need a dirt road trip with old friends SOON!!